I hate to be the voice that may rain on some parades, but the perfect work-life balance doesn’t exist. No, this isn’t a list of the jobs with the best work-life balance; however, I have a few thoughts to share on the concepts of work-life balance.
Working from home or hybrid has blurred the lines for many families. Within 1 hour, I might switch back and forth between being a husband – father – and financial advisor multiple times.
I do not punch a clock, but I work more than I did pre-COVID. Tasks are more scattered, and yet, somehow more efficient. The rare few hours the three kids are in school, overlapping with the baby’s nap time, are the most productive hours of my day!
Sometimes, I may take an afternoon off and make up for it by doing research or emails after the kids are in bed – I’m compartmentalizing time more efficiently than ever.
To me, the myth of work-life balance is an unfair expectation for people to put on themselves, but we can dedicate our time to what’s most pressing and precious at the time. There’s no 50/50 split between work and home; that number isn’t static. It is fluid. The trick is understanding how to divide your efforts, addressing what’s most important, and not spreading yourself too thin.
I think the most overlooked part of balance is me-time or self-care. I am guilty of neglecting my health or fun, as time spent on yourself is the easiest to sacrifice. I am struggling with it currently, as many of us are. But, it’s my goal in this upcoming year to learn to manage self-care time better.
Of course, there are certain positions with greater work-life balance than others. No one expects a pottery instructor to work the same demanding hours as a fortune 500 CFO, but that’s beyond the point; work-life balance is less about the position and more about how we allocate our time and not overextend ourselves.
As a family financial planner, I hear all types of methodologies and anecdotes on how to spend more time with the kids and less time working- balance is the goal. However, balance can mean giving things proper attention when needed—not mathematically allocating time in equal percentages.
A-I-M (Assess, Integrate, Moderate)
There’s an acronym that has been passed around and publicized for a few decades, and I appreciate the sentiment. A-I-M means to assess, integrate and moderate the tasks, obligations, and desires in your personal life. If you struggle to make time for your kids, friends, family, and hobbies, there are ways to make changes and help satisfy your desires to keep up with them.
I assess situations to see if they’re something I MUST be involved with or if they can be completed or done by someone else. For example, I have clients that could manage their finances, but the time, effort, and dedication to doing so are better left to solicit the services of someone like myself. We’re constantly assessing the “opportunity cost” of our time in exchange for completing tasks; never let the costs be something you’ll regret later in life. I would rather spend the time on the beach playing with my kids than sitting through an online seminar in the middle of a summer day. Some moments are fleeting, and others will always be available.
Integrating parts of our lives can be fun exploitation of how to further your time. What does integrating mean in this context? An example would be that you need to run to the bank and do a few errands, but you don’t want your kids sitting at home watching TV. Bring them along and turn the errands into something fun! Squeeze a visit to the park in between stops, take them for ice cream, throw the ball around, anything to integrate an ordinary daily task with something special and kindred.
I love running errands with my 3-year-old, Boden, which allows me to be alone with him. H will get upset if he sees new groceries in the house because he knows he missed a father-son trip. Another “chore” we love is the car wash! He is in charge of wiping down the interior while I am vacuuming – it’s a great time.
With my four kids, there are times when one might take an “unfair” share of time over the others, but it does not mean they are more important than the other three. When the kids are young, there are stages in life when they need an “unfair” share of the balance (time and money.) Whether coaching a T-Ball team to give a reluctant athlete extra encouragement, helping a struggling child with schoolwork or making friends, you’ll need to show extra attention here and there; it’s just how it works. As they age, you can make up for it down the line. My wife and I understand how present actions may affect future behavior.
Moderating is perhaps the most important piece of the A-I-M formula. Do not overbook yourself! No matter what, time is tight, meetings run over, practices run late, and traffic builds up; no matter how hard you try to manage the clock, overbooking yourself is a surefire way to find less fulfillment in your day and more stress.
A Discussion on Work-Life Balance
Even though I’m a financial planner, quite a bit of my profession is geared toward providing a holistic perspective on people’s lives. I’m always happy to help people discuss their financial goals and beyond.
Click the link below to book some time with me to start a conversation.
